Good luck Teddy Bear … you’ll need it

So, golden-voiced homeless man Ted Williams has left rehab today and I am shocked, simply shocked. If you can’t count on a 20+ year drug addict and booze hound catapulted to international, overnight fame to keep it together, then I just don’t know what to believe in anymore. I mean, who would ever have guessed that this dirty, crack-scented man with his Pied Piper voice would have led us — as well as one Dr. Mr. Phil McGraw — off the cliff of despair like the rats, hobo-loving rats. Luckily, for us, there are ways to escape the unrelenting pain of lost dreams in the form of a bottle, one that holds the tears of unmet expectations and what could have been and, of course, crack cocaine.

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